Gammophobia is the irrational, uncontrolled and persistent fear of marriage; although they tend to be confused, it is not the same as fear of commitment, philophobia. The difference between these two concepts, is that a person who suffers from gamophobia has no fear or problem in establishing a serious and lasting relationship, as long as it does not trigger in marriage, that’s where their fear originates.
While the causes of phobias are unique to each individual, it is considered that this fear begins before reaching adulthood, unless something catastrophic that generates that fear in the person, such as a traumatic divorce.
According to specialist Rosalba Lázaro, head of studies at the Department of Psychology at the Universidad Iberoamericana in Mexico City, in an article on the Salud 180 website, “phobias can make certain acts impossible”, referring to the realization of them; in the case of gamophobia, it occurs because “all the thoughts related to the aggression and sexuality that human beings experience are lodged in the unconscious”.
Currently there is no drug for this or any other phobia, in this specific case it is recommended to talk about the pros and cons of marriage with someone you trust with whom you feel connected, inform your partner about this fear, since communication and understanding are the keys to overcoming this phobia; and finally, in case you consider it necessary, you can go with professionals in phobias to perform psychotherapy, behavioral therapy and exposure therapy, as a possible solution to your problem.
Blanca Isabel Soria Arranz, the expert sex therapist in couples and family mediation, on the web site Mundo Psicólogos, points out that although this phobia is more common in men, since they consider that they will lose the possibility of enjoying certain experiences associated with singleness and it is socially better seen that a man has several partners; in recent years, the number of women with this phobia has increased, as they hate the traditional to which the married woman is subjected, thus causing them gammophobia, boycotting their partners and relationships unconsciously.
The symptoms that are associated with this phobia usually become evident when the idea of marriage becomes concrete, later conversations associated with marriage are avoided at all costs, thus producing an evasion of the subject. In addition to the symptoms mentioned, at the moment the idea materializes, the person can panic, speeding up the heart rate, lack of air to breathe, tremor, fear and terror.
Feeling afraid of marriage can be normal; however, we are sure that when finding the right person overcoming this fear will be easier for those who suffer from it. Additionally, professional help will never be out of place, which will generate at the end of the day a positive impact on the life not only of those who suffer from this phobia, but their partner’s.
ALFA